fighting off uncertainty
I wake up some days with lots of uncertainty. But the people around me are also uncertain, or going through parts of their lives ending. Or starting. Or just going through something.
And that's fine. The problem is that I'm sensitive to others feelings and emotions. I pick up on emotions that are not mine originally. And it kind of ruins my rest of the day.
I feel stressed out by someone's own life problems as if they were my own when I sense the stress oozing out of others.
And I have enough stress in my own life to worry about. I have to figure out lots of things starting really early on in the day. I have days where the kids wake up with me. And so I have no time to decompress and start the day with quiet or uninterrupted coffee. The stress from others later on just sort of makes everything much worse.
It feels incredibly lonesome, and, honestly like my emotions do not matter if I react or don't react.
I hate to be emotionally derailed by others emotions and feelings oozing out of them the moment they wake up. Usually much later on in the day when mine has already begun.
But I'm not blaming them and I don't blame them for their issues bleeding into my life. I'm blaming myself for how I'm reacting and not blocking it.
I need to learn how to effectively move on with my life. And to not have my plans derailed.