I'm a stay at home mom, Tradwives are performative imo.
I saw Absurd Pirate's post at the top this morning. As much as he loves my page (not), I'm going to piggyback off of the topic of Tradwives. Tradwives are kind of annoying.
It's all performative and very much not real life. I get that that is most of Youtube, but every one of those videos that shows a woman in a prairie dress getting up at 4am to bake 30 items of food (usually bread and muffins) for "a months worth of food" is incredibly performative.
The whole point of the word TradWives, is that it means "Traditional Wives". But there is nothing traditional about filming yourself for Youtube and setting up a camera to make it look...like some serious film. If you remove the dress and put on modern clothes, are you no longer a TradWife? Or does the uniform come with the label?
I'm a huge fan of being a stay at home mom. I love being at home with my kids, it's the best thing you could ever do as a mother.
I'm not going to outsource my kids to some other woman so that I can work and have an "identity". My identity now ultimately involves my children, and that's usually how it's always been anyway. It's not always ME ME ME. IF you want a good life, your identity will revolve around other people, and if you are a mother, that means your own children. This is normal, natural, and nothing to be ashamed of.
I love that my husband provides for us, and I have no issue with not having a career, or a "job" I don't believe women were meant to work corporate, or away from home anyway. IN a sense, I am a "tradwife" without the uniform. I do not believe in lots of things that are mainstream beliefs.
But the thing is, we have to be clear, these women are making money (as was stated in the post I mentioned earlier) by filming themselves for Youtube or other social media. You can't pretend your husband is the sole provider when you're a big influencer in the TradWife space.
And honestly, what are you going to do when that trend is over? Which is kind of is. The whole Cozy trend is in conjunction with this.
Are you still going to wear little house on the prairie dresses and pretend you're some magical woman for waking up at 4am and baking and processing everything? I mean I do that too, but I don't do it at 4am, and I don't do it in a dress oftentimes. I stay at home all day, I don't have to wake up at 4AM to make dinner. I mean...I have no livestock, but my dad never woke up at 4AM to feed the chickens. He did so because he had to for work. They ate at regular wake times otherwise.
Wow I sound like a hater. Don't get me wrong that life is a dream. I WANT that life. I'm about 60% there. I want to wake up and feed chickens, milk a cow...Sell baked goods and self harvested plants that I grew myself...but I understand that I don't have to wear a dress all the time to do these things. I don't have to call myself a TradWife. I don't need a label, or a uniform, or a horde of women in a trend doing these things to do this. And one day I will take care of a homestead, and milk cows, and process chickens... but it's not because I saw a lady do these things, It's because I have always wanted to. but I'm probably stopping at 3 children, I am NOT having 10. How am I supposed to focus on 10 children and the house?? Where do I put them??
Jokes aside,
This one tradwife lady that pisses me off the most is the lady that looks like she has botox (whether she does or not idk) that always has her hair in this MASSIVE bun (I'm not good with descriptions lol). Her stare is off putting.
Anyway, that lady is usually saying some really stupid stuff, usually conspiracy theories with no backing, but on top of that, she ALWAYS has a glass of raw milk in her videos that she is supposedly sipping on. And, look, I understand it if you have a farm cow where you get your milk directly from...I have nothing against "Raw" foods... but it is so...incredibly performative to have a glass every single video. Does she drink that glass every single video? I joke around with my husband that she dumps the glass in her sink when she's done recording.
Something else that bothers me about Tradwives or similar female influencers in general. Is that they show their children on their videos. I'm against content involving children of any age, because I feel like you shouldn't make money off of your own children, but also they deserve a childhood without cameras constantly on them.
SO yes, Tradwives are performative, and if you're a stay at home mom (like me) just... be yourself. Organically. I am going to end the post here.